Making Comfortable.. Uncomfortable

Which really, should make you as comfortable as ever. TIME FOR TEA!

Welcome! This might be a shit show.

Hey. Honestly, first thing I want to get out of the way, is how uncomfortable I already feel. Kind of an "I don't know what I'm doing here?!" moment. So if you are here, checking this out, we are in the same boat. Secondly, I want to know why we feel so uncomfortable. Do I feel a little strange being vulnerable on a new platform with people I hardly know? Totally. Should I make you feel a little strange too, that you are reading this and might hardly know me? Kind of weird. Now we are getting places. Let's break down that barrier, shall we?

You're first impression of me is already me overthinking. We might as well get it all out of the way now. I have a lot I want to share and say, but starting is always going to be an awkward spot. I want you to want to get uncomfortable with me. If you bare through this post and dare to stay- you just might be a perfect part of it.

I'll be honest when I say I don't have much shame. I've never been one to blush or get so embarrassed that I think about it for hours on end. If I ever have, I choose to make it more awkward by doing some weird apology over something I've overthought or making things mega weird and oversharing to make what I was embarrassed about, a little less embarrassing. I push through uncomfortable moments by oversharing, turning it into a laugh, and just hoping if people talk about what I said or did later, its all a joke. I don't know why we are so scared and embarrassed of who we actually are. Whether there's a filter or not, the things we say comes from a place within us, and that's probably who we genuinely are. Maybe we've worded it incorrectly, sure, or it didn't come out the way we imagine and people laugh at it. Why is that such an issue? It's literally just a moment that's probably going to be only thought about by you at night. Everyone else is too worried about themselves the same way you are worried about your own faults. Is there a way to just agree that we all think the same weird things and have less shame when we share our thoughts out loud? Some of the best conversations I've had have strung from a series of weird comments, one strange sentence, or even a joke. I don't know why It's so taboo to chat about the weird things that happen when we are alone, what you went through during puberty, or the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you. Make it normal!! If you don't make it normal, everyone around you is going to continue to act like its strange when they are probably having a moment inside thinking of a similar moment that happened to them. See? Normal. They are thinking it too. Im sure you just thought about a super embarrassing moment the same way I thought about when I flooded the bathroom Christmas morning 5 years ago and my mum texted my boyfriend asking him to bring over a lighter and candles before family brunch. Maybe the time I tripped at the park and busted my knee but continued to walk on it because I didn't want to be embarrassed or admit I was in pain in front of my friends I knew would make fun of me. Now that's out of the way and the weight is off my chest.. We can continue :)

You only feel uncomfortable because you've been trained to feel this way. Someone has told you before that what you've said or done is wrong, but it's not. Whatever your dwelling on was probably genuine and you probably have thought about why you feel so much guilt about it. THERE IS NO SHAME IN BEING HONEST, OR YOURSELF. Or at least, there shouldn't be. I think the whole purpose of this first post, and being uncomfortable with you, is that it'll hopefully make your future a little less uncomfortable, or let you live with a little less stress about the things you can't control. 'Eff whoever doesn't want to stick around to see all that you are, continue to own it and I'm sure the right ones will come your way. Your life starts when you start admitting to yourself that you aren't an aesthetic, or someone who has to put on a charade for whoever crosses your path. The right people could be right in front of you, but without getting vulnerable and uncomfortable, how will you ever know?

Let's keep this short and sweet as a first post. Accept the things you cannot change, quit dwelling on past words or actions. Move forward, be more true, be more genuine. If you aren't being you, how do you even know the people around you like the "real" version of you? If you like to chat about taboo topics, find the people that accept them and question them. I promise you that strutting the true version of yourself is so much more important that fitting in to the status quo of what people want you to be. Find the connections that make you think, make you wonder, and most of all, make you uncomfortable.

Cheers,

All Things Honest

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